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The Fall 2009 issue: online and available at a Cornell / IC / Collegetown location near you!

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Zombie Chic

Image “They’re zombies. They’re strippers. No— they’re zombie strippers.”

By Kathleen Jercich
Fall 2009


In case you haven’t been following Jenna Jameson’s voluptuous career lately, the porn star-cum-director recently released a cinematic masterpiece in which she also played the starring role. Zombie Strippers, ladies and gentlemen — what happens when you put the “hor” back in “cannibalistic, bloodthirsty horde.” Zombies, once one of the few classic horror movie monsters unencumbered by the weight of their own crushing libidos (I’m looking at you, Stephenie Meyer), have finally succumbed to the inevitable: zombie porn. The old days, when one could flip on Cinemax innocently expecting some hot living-on-living action, are no more. Compared to the rampant wave of orgasms heralded by any mention of Edward Cullen, however, zombies do not inspire fangirling from a purely visceral point of view. It’s hard, after all, to get it up for a rotting corpse who wants to eat your brains — even when that corpse used to be on the cover of Dirty Bob’s Xcellent Adventures 25. The truth, horrifying as it is, is that far from being the ticket into Silent Hill conventions it once was, objectifying zombies has become — dare I say it — chic.
 
That's How He Rolls

Kitsch gets an exclusive, tell-all interview with the infamous Segway Freshman.

By Michelle Spektor
Fall 2009


You may have seen him zooming along in the bicycle lane of the Thurston Avenue Bridge. Or maybe you’ve noticed his Segway parked at a bike rack on campus. Maybe you’re even one of the several thousand fans of “Segway Kid” on Facebook. All of the hype raises the question: who IS that Segway guy, and what is his story? Well, anxious readers, to answer these pressing inquiries, Kitsch has exclusively interviewed Mr. Segway himself.
 
Ghost Hunters

A look into paranormal investigation in Central New York.

By Rachel Louise Ensign
Fall 2009


Stacey Jones gave me directions to her home: enter a large state forest, pass the state trooper barracks, then find the house across from the vacant bar and burned down building, but my journey to Mrs. Jones’s house really began when I noticed a bumper sticker on a rusty old white car parked next door to my house in Ithaca. Gotghosts.org, Central New York Ghost Hunters, it read. Their website described them as an “organization [that] is geared towards people who are quite skeptical and are serious about claims into the paranormal.”
 
Blood-sucking Politics

Does True Blood really promote gay rights? Or is it just about vampire sex instead?

By James Fairbrother
Fall 2009


"Friends don’t let friends drink friends.” Um, what the hell does that mean? Whether you watch the HBO series True Blood or not, chances are you’ve probably seen the creepy-ass advertising campaign that appears to be hocking fake blood for people to drink. While it sounds disgusting, this advertising campaign is just one of the many reasons that people are watching True Blood, which has recently exploded in popularity. Thankfully, the synthetic blood only exists in the series’ disturbing fantasy world for the vampires to mainstream into society. (But if you really can’t get enough of it, or if you’re in some freaky vampire cult à la second season Buffy, there is a blood orange flavored soda packaged to match the show.)
 
Green-"washed" Café?

An investigation into the greenwashing accusations against Ithaca’s new Green Café.

By Helen Havlak
Fall 2009


When Green Café opened its doors on March 27, it was hailed as a refreshing addition to the stagnating Collegetown economy and the possible harbinger of a Collegetown renaissance. Reviewers praised its urban-chic décor and gushed over the much-needed revitalization of the corner of College Ave. and Dryden.

Soon, however, the discrepancies between Green Café’s name and sustainability practices began to catch the attention of students and locals.
 
Ivy Ink
By Rachel Louise Ensign
Photos by Josh Stansfield
Fall 2009

In this issue’s photo essay, six Cornell students show us their tattoos and tell us the stories behind them. For these students, their tattoos have a wide range of meanings; they are reminders of important people and often of the time in their life when the youthful urge to put something permanent on their body was just too strong to resist.
 
Gay Without the Giggles

Exit CLASSIC GAY MALE. Enter GAY BADASS. Introducing the new face of homosexuals in the media.

By Laura Van Winkle
Fall 2009


The Classic Gay Male is under serious pressure. He has long had the responsibility of representing homosexuals in movies and on television, but viewers haven’t completely decided how they feel about him. He’s struggling to stifle the flow of hate and fear. He’s giggling and smiling and making pop culture references. But this two-dimensional, family-friendly face, which he strives to project frequently, brings criticism: Isn’t that a stereotype? I have homosexual friends and they’re nothing like that. I hate the way all gay people on TV are the same. That’s not accurate. These criticisms weigh heavy on the Classic Gay Male’s already burdensome responsibilities. The mass of our misgivings is crushing him.

Luckily for him, someone else has arrived to share the task of being the public face of gay men.
 
A Day in the Life

A look into the lives of typical (and not so typical) representatives of each Cornell college.

By Julie Chen
Art by Andrew Schwartz
Fall 2009


One of the downsides to attending a university whose motto is “Any Person, Any Study” is that students often have little clue as to what exactly those taking different academic paths than they do study. To remedy this saddening dearth of cross-college understanding, our intrepid reporter conducted interviews with seven students from the seven undergraduate colleges at Cornell to find out what a day in their life entails.
 
Guidelines for Waistlines

How vanity sizing has changed the American woman’s fashion experience.


By Sarah Matte
Fall 2009


In recent decades, the American fashion industry has shrunk women’s clothing sizes to accommodate the inversely widening American public. No one seems to be able to pinpoint what store exactly started shrinking their sizes in order to sell more clothes, but it likely began in 1983 when the U.S. Department of Commerce dropped the uniform sizing system for women, saying that it no longer reflected the size and shape of the average consumer. Once a uniform, standard size was no longer required in clothing stores, businesses realized they could manipulate their sizes.
 
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